Truth About Pregnancy - 2nd Half Edition

Editor's Note: I wrote this over the 2nd half of my pregnancy and haven't had a chance to post it until now (after Mila is born); now all this stuff seems so insignificant and worth every bit of it to have her BUT it's still all true so read on :)

Well, well, well. It's that time again to bring you up to speed of all of the horrendous things about pregnancy that no ones tells you about or warns you about.  Let's just jump right into it. 

Things That Suck About Being Pregnant - Part 2
1. Hemorrhoids. Let's just say, thanks to Ace Ventura, I thought these were on the OUTSIDE of your butt. This is absolutely not the case.

2. Pee Stream. Another thing no one tells you about, but really, how do you bring this up in a casual conversation?  As the baby gets bigger it starts pressing on your urethra (is it called that if you're a girl??) so your pee stream, while it may have been a nice good stream before baby, is trickle-y.  make sure you have an extra 10 minutes to sit in the bathroom to empty your tank.

3. Loss of Independence.  I consider myself to be a pretty independent person. That being said, it is SO hard to not be able to be able to do things on your own, including seeing your bikini line (or your feet for that matter) and lifting heavy (or not so heavy) objects, etc. because you are pregnant.  People don't want you walking up stairs, they drop you off at the curb, heck, they don't even let you carry your own purse!  Everyone wants you to just sit around and rest, but what if you're not used to that?

In the last month of pregnancy you become so tired, sore, etc. that it's hard to keep up with the things that you used to do. Like work a whole 8 hours, go grocery shopping, run errands, walk the dog.  Your mind still wants to do all of these things but you're body just can't handle it without multiple breaks.  It definitely takes some adjusting.

4. Stupid stuff people say.  Let's reminisce.

• "Are you pregnant with twins?" - Seriously?? Like when you can't tell if someone is pregnant or just fat, this is one of those times where you keep your mouth shut and keep this comment to yourself.
• "You're starting to have that sweaty, pregnant look going on.  You know, up by your hair."  Someone actually said this to me. And I wasn't sweating at the time and my hair looked like it normally does (yes, I went straight to the bathroom to check. and to stop from crying :-/)
• "Are you sure there's only one baby in there?"  The girl that asked me this was like 30lbs over weight and EATING PORK RINDS when she asked me this.  It took all my self control not to ask her if she was pregnant as well.
• "Wow! Look how big you're getting!"  About halfway through the pregnancy people stop telling you how tiny you are and they switch to how big you are getting. I have found this is almost always commented on by men; maybe they think that's what we, women, want to hear, like being big makes us a better vessel for carrying a baby. Tsk tsk men, let's keep those comments in check and keep telling me how tiny I look, mmmk?

5. Mood swings.  Okay, so everyone knows that pregnant women have mood swings all over the board.  But that didn't make it any easier to have a bad day "just because" or to flip out over the drop of a hat (baby daddies, watch out).  I would recommend to DVR old episodes of Extreme Home Makeover to watch every week for a cleansing cry.

6. Vaginal soreness.  Seriously it feels like I got kicked in the vagina (which apparently is completely normal because the va-j-j bones are softening to make room for the bebe). I can only imagine how sore it will feel after I birth a baby from my hooha.

7. Underoos.  Stop wearing your nice Hanky Panky/Victoria's Secret underwear after like week 36. trust me on this one. all kinds of gross/weird things starts happening that you don't want to expose your fancy pants underoos to. or, if you're like me, you can use this as an excuse for a post-baby shopping spree!

And, if you know me (wait. if you don't, why are you reading my blog then? that's just creepy), you may know that I have really had this dreamy, amazing, unicorn pregnancy that doesn't seem to happen very often. I haven't had ANY of the horrible symptoms associated with pregnancy (morning sickness, acne, swelling, stretch marks, varicose veins, acne and probably many other things I don't even know about).  I truly have been super lucky to feel almost exactly like I did pre-baby, just with a basketball sticking out of my abdomen.  That being said, I feel I must let you in on some of the little known good things about being pregnant (besides the little bundle of joy you get to bring home from the hospital with you).

• Leg Hair.  If your pregnant with a girl, expect to shave less often. Yes you heard that right, and no, I don't know why it is, something to do with the hormones the little one is producing.  If you're having a little boy, though, be prepared for extra leg hair because of all of the testosterone you're producing
• Cut-sies.  No one likes to keep a pregnant lady waiting.  People will let you cut in line in the bathroom, at the grocery store, on the elevator, pretty much everywhere. Take advantage!
• Luscious hair.  Not only does your hair grow fast because of the prenatal vitamins, but it's also two times thicker and almost always looks amazing (except for when you have that whole "sweaty look" going on).
• Baby showers.  I was lucky enough not to have one, not two, but THREE baby showers.  All three of these were thrown with love and showed me just how much I meant to the people in my life.  Showers and parties are always fun but it's on a whole new level when they are in honor of you.

So see, it's not ALLLL bad.  But don't you worry, there will be a "Truth About Birth/After Birth" edition as well (this is probably the thing that terrifies me the most!) so stay tuned.  Until then, have a peek at this blog post to prepare you. Note: I read this after first becoming pregnant and couldn't put two and two together that they WERE talking about how to take care of yourself after labor and not how to recover from a car crash. Prepare to have your mind BLOWN.

Letter to Mila

My little Mila,

I found out I was pregnant with you on January 29th, 2012.  My friends, Jet, Shantelle and Leondro were out here celebrating Jet's birthday and as soon as I dropped them off at the airport I went and bought a pregnancy test. I already had a feeling I was pregnant and the test just confirmed it.  Daddy was at work that day so I had to wait hours for him to get home to tell him (don't worry, I got it all on video!).  This was the best news we had ever received.  We are so excited for your arrival, our little miracle.  We haven't even met you yet and you are so incredibly loved, not only by us, but by everyone in our lives.  You are one lucky girl.

It's still hard to believe that you are going to be born soon and that you will be a perfect creation of Robert and me.

We are anxiously scrambling around, awaiting for your arrival, trying to make sure that everything is perfect.  Your dad and I are trying to take advantage of our last few days together, just the two of us, before our life changes forever. At this point I think we are both such bundles of emotion, from excited to nervous and everything in between.

Your dad is so excited for you to be here.  You should see the look on his face when we talk about you or someone brings you up. He has been so involved with this pregnancy, from coming to all of the doctor's appointments to having a say in everything that goes into the nursery; this is one of the benefits of being the first born.  I may be biased, but you have the best dad in the world; he is going to teach you so many things and I can't wait to see him interact with you. I have seen him with a couple babies since we found out I was pregnant and I can't wait to see him holding OUR baby.  I can't imagine him ever being happier than he is right now but I know that will happen in just a matter of time.

There are so many things I can't wait to do with you. Even though it's many, many years away, I find myself thinking about all of the things we will do together one day as mother and daughter.  We will get manicures and pedicures, look for prom dresses and, one day, wedding dresses. When I work weddings at the Hyatt I find myself tearing up watching the father/daughter dance because one day I know that will be you and your daddy.

We are so excited for you to arrive, baby girl. This is just the beginning of the rest of our lives.

Love,
Mommy

38 Weeks, Doctor's Appointment & Baby Care Basics

How far along? 38 weeks
Total weight gain: 29lbs
Maternity clothes? i'm over all of them
Stretch marks? still none! yay!
Sleep: actually sleeping really good lately (knock on wood), but still so exhausted come 3pm
Best moment this week: i had a great baby shower this past Friday with all my work friends
Worst moment this week:  THE HEAT. It was 87 degrees in our house last Friday night when we were trying to sleep. we are definitely considering installing air condition in the spring.
Miss anything? mmmm pear cider
Movement: lots of body parts sticking out of my stomach and "flopping" movements
Food cravings: still loving iced tea. mmm, especially arnold palmers. how have I never had these until now?!
Anything making you queasy or sick? nothing really anymore
Labor signs: today before my doctor's appointment I took Roscoe for a quick walk and about halfway down the block I started feeling sick, which isn't unusual. It was a little weird because my back was hurting and I suddenly felt like I had to poop.  I hightailed it home, laid down for a second and then got up and went to the bathroom.  Pain gone, nothing a little poop couldn't take care of....or so I thought! (fast forward to the doctor's appointment update below).
Belly button in or out? half in, half out
Wedding rings on or off? it's a good day if I can get one on
Mood? great :)
Looking forward to: my parents getting in town next week, my last day of work (next Friday) and finishing up the last few items on my To Do list

I snapped this cute little photo of my love bug. He loves his mom :)

We had our 2nd, and final, baby preparation class on Monday night this week called Baby Care Basics. I already knew pretty much everything they went over (just call me a mom expert...JUST KIDDING), but I knew Robert wouldn't go without me and he definitely learned a lot of new stuff. He was a good sport about it and I only had to pinch a couple times to buy attention and stop watching the football game on his phone :)  They discussed how to bathe, feed, diaper, and clothe a baby as well as what needs to be done to baby proof your house. It was a very hands on class too; we had to bring a baby to practice on and Robert did pretty good. By far, though, the funniest thing that he did was the swaddling.



Left: Robert's swaddle; Right: my swaddle

In all fairness, though, Robert did get better as the night went on and even put my swaddle to shame!

Our doctor's appointment today was very eventful. First, our doctor was running late because she had an emergency C-section to take care of. When we did get in an see her, everything was just like it always is, they took my blood pressure (it's low), asked me if I have been feeling any contractions (not that I know of), measured my stomach (she said my stomach hadn't got any bigger so we weren't looking at a very big baby, which was music to my ears) and then the vaginal exam. dun dun dun.

 

She checked to see how much I was dilated and said that I was still at 1cm (I had no feelings of disappointment OR excitement, which was weird).  She did say I was 60% effaced and that she would sweep my membranes next week, which I was happy to hear.  Side note: last week she told me she was going to sweep my membranes this week, which I had mixed feelings about because, after reading online, some women went into labor that night to 72 hours later, but some women it did nothing for.  I didn't really want to have the baby this early (I have a schedule to keep!) but doctor knows best so if that's what she wanted to do, who I was to argue.  So hopefully this will work out perfectly; she will sweep me next week and by the time I will go into labor (if it works) I will have my To Do list done, all my loose ends at work will be tied up, my parents will be here and we will be good to go.

 

As she was stretching my cervix she said, "there! that's a contraction. Do you feel it?"  Of course I did not and she was like you don't feel that pressure?? And I said, no, I mean it's uncomfortable but I feel like that's because you're up in there.  She said that she was able to stretch me to 2cm, which is what brought the contraction on, and that most women would find that very painful.  This is the best thing that I have heard since they said "it's a girl!"!  I am hoping that this means that my threshold is very high and the contractions won't bother me TOO much. Woohoo!!!  She said that because I am not really affected by them that I most likely won't have any false labor, where I go to the hospital and they have to send me home because I am not dilated enough, and that by the time the contractions start bothering me I will be in active labor (4-5cm).  Unfortunately, while she was able to stretch me out to 2cm, she said I would go back down to 1cm on my own.

 

I did mention to her what happened when I was walking Roscoe and she said that was most likely a contraction. Only I would confuse the urge to poop with a contraction, BUT I believe this is a good problem to have :)

 

Upcoming Doctor's Appointments

9/26 at 3:45pm
10/3 at 3pm...just in case

California Baby Shower(s)

Being from Kansas City I don't have a TON a friends and no family (except for Robert's family and Andrea's mom, dad and brother, which I consider my own) in the area. That being said, the people that I do have in my life out here are absolutely amazing and made me, Robert and Mila feel so special.  It's hard being so far from your parents, sister and best friends but I am so touched, and lucky, by all of the people we do have in our lives.

There were not one, but TWO, baby showers thrown for us out here in California.

The first one was in August and thrown by my boss' wife, Catherine, and my very dear work friend/mom, Allison. It was held at my boss' house and it turned out so great.  Pretty much everyone I am close to in California was there and I even handled being the center of attention pretty well :)  I cannot believe all of the AMAZING gifts that we received.  Sadly I didn't get a TON of pictures, everyone was having too much fun!



Look at that awesome diaper cake from Allison and her daughter, Lindsey

Robert's parents (left) and their best friends, Shanda & Bernie

Robert, two of his best friends (Ross and Garret) and my boss Geoff

My second mom & dad (Andrea's parents, Sally and Al), my mom and Catherine, Geoff's wife

My second shower was this past Friday and was thrown and attended by all of the women at my work. It was such a fun day, we definitely need to do things like this more often and get all of the girls together.  We cut out of work early on Friday and headed over to Gigi's house for some of the most delicious food I have had in a while (it was a potluck, my fav!), as well as delicious champagne and pomegranate margaritas....I had lemonade, which was good, but not AS good :)  Surprisingly, there weren't that many shower games at my first two showers so I welcomed the games at this one...and they were good ones! We played a Price Is Right game where we had to guess the prices of different items, a guessing game of how many tootsie rolls were in a jar and a very tricky game of trying to find safety pins submerged in rice while blindfolded.  All of the games were a riot!

Look at all this DELICIOUS food and all these presents!

Me with Beth, Giorgina and the hostess with the mostest, Gigi

Allison, Tami and Beth with their Price is Right scorecards...Allison won!

All of the wonderful ladies from my office...so lucky to work with such a great group of women!

We are still amazed by how generous everyone was. We truly know what it feels like to be loved and this little girl is one spoiled little lady. This just goes to show you that your family doesn't always consist of blood relatives, some of your family is the people you choose to have in your life.

Chichis La Leche

Since becoming pregnant I knew I wanted to attempt to breastfeed as long as possible (exclusively pumping as soon as it starts getting weird though; I'm not going to be like that lady on the cover of Time magazine!) so I have been doing research on it because I know it doesn't work for everyone.  Saturday morning Robert and I went to a breastfeeding class just to be extra prepared.  Yes, Robert actually came as well. From work. In uniform.  I was super impressed.  The class was two hours and actually pretty interesting, especially with Robert cracking jokes next to me the entire time.

Okay, this is the part of the post where I make notes to remind myself about what I learned in the class to reflect back on once the baby gets here and I am a sleepless zombie.  Please feel free to skip the bullet points.

Breastfeeding Tips

• Your hand can be the most manual (and free!) breast pump that you have.  The cells the produce the milk are way back on your chest wall so the best way to manually pump milk is to press against your chest wall and roll.
• The bumps on your areola omit the smell of amniotic fluid so the baby has a familiar smell when looking to nurse. In addition, these bumps also omit (leak?) a liquid that acts as an cleanser so you aren't supposed to ever wash your nipples.
• Skin-to-skin contact immediately after birth is best for breastfeeding; under most circumstances the baby will instinctively try to latch on. Unfortunately, at the hospital I am delivering at does not routinely practice this so you have to ask.  If I have a C-section then Robert will be able to do the skin-to-skin contact (just to initiate the process, not to attempt to feed the baby!). They did remind all of the dads that they only need to take off their shirts, though, because, apparently, one time one dad got completely naked. ha!
• You should be breastfeeding a minimum of 8 times a day, but ideally 12 times a day. They say an average of 10 times per day; anything over 15 minutes counts as a feed. Ideally you will offer one breast as the meal, burp the baby, and then offer the other breast as dessert. Sometimes the baby will want dessert and sometimes she won't.
• You should only start pumping 2 weeks before going back to work. Other than that you should be exclusively breastfeeding.  The first time you pump, do it in the morning and feed the baby first and then pump. Ideally, feed the baby AND pump at the same time.
• Every night you should sterilize your pump parts in the dishwasher or in the specially made bags.  Between every pumping session clean the parts using Medela pump wipes.
• Cabbage leaves can help relieve engorgement.  Wash the leaves and put them in your bra and voila!

Baby's Second Night
In our breastfeeding class the lactation consultant did give us a piece of advice that I haven't heard yet: on the baby's second night, take a nap at 5pm.  She said this is when your baby has discovered that she is no longer in the warm and comfortable womb.  It is at this time that the baby will be up every hour from 10pm to 8am wanting to feed.

Next up: Baby Care Basics class tomorrow.  Where Robert will learn how to feed, diaper, and bathe (so pretty much care) for a baby for the first time.  Let's hope I don't go into labor before tomorrow night or Robert might be lost!

37 Weeks & Doctor's Appointment

How far along? 37 weeks
Total weight gain: 29lbs
Maternity clothes? anything comfortable and cool. and the tighter the better (I've found this makes you look less fat)
Stretch marks? still none! woot!
Sleep: actually sleeping really good lately (knock on wood), but still so exhausted.
Best moment this week: i passed my paraplanner certification mid-term! yay!
Worst moment this week:  oh the pain.  the difference i feel from last week to this week is a complete 180.   I'm retaining so much water that my ankles and my feet are constantly swollen, to the point that they hurt. My back feels like someone came at me with a baseball bat. I wish I could tell you that I am just being over-dramatic, but sadly this is the harsh, harsh truth.
Miss anything? watching football, drinking a pear cider.
Movement: lots of body parts sticking out of my stomach and "flopping" movement
Food cravings: i suddenly love iced tea
Anything making you queasy or sick? still feeling nauseous at night for whatever reason
Labor signs: i may or may not have lost my mucus plug this week (sorry, TMI), which doesn't necessarily mean anything because some people lose. i am still 1cm dilated, the baby is head down and low.
Belly button in or out? half in, half out and a little painful
Wedding rings on or off? i couldn't wear any for a while but I am back to wearing one now
Mood? everyone keeps asking me how i am feeling; the best way to describe it is to say that it feels like i am going on vacation to a a job interview.  so excited (vacation) but so nervous and antsy (job interview).
Looking forward to: my work baby shower on Friday :)

Roscoe is busy preparing for Mila to arrive!  This book, Just Me and My Little Sister, was given to me on my 4th birthday from my aunt and my uncle; it was only right that it be passed on to him.

Our doctor's appointment went well today.  Since I am 37 weeks now, and considered full term, my doctor said she won't stop me if I go in to labor so that's pretty crazy.  My blood pressure is still looking good so I can keep working, although I think I may stop working on October 2nd, assuming I haven't had her yet, rather than working right up until I deliver.  My B Strep Test came back negative, which is great news, so I won't need antibiotics during delivery.

I had another vaginal exam today and, unfortunately this one hurt!  She said I am still 1cm dilated but the baby is much lower this week; I am also partially effaced so that's good news.  In order to get to my cervix she had to reach around the baby's head so this exam was MUCH more uncomfortable than the last one.  She did say that next week she may stretch out my cervix (OWWWW) and break my membranes (what?!), which will help her shoot for a 39th week delivery because that is the optimal time to have the baby. Obviously she can't guarantee that will jumpstart labor and she won't induce me until my 41st week. 

She said that the baby is so low that I probably won't drop any more, which is kind of disappointing because, even though she is lower, she is still sitting so high and it's hard to breathe.  I asked if the baby was a good size and she said that she estimates that she is normal size (not too big or too small) and, if I go to my due date, she will probably be about 7-7.5lbs.  She said my weight gain has been great and I am measuring right at 37 weeks so she doesn't think Mila will be too big.

So, looks like things are right on track. I can't believe there are only 18 more days until my due date.  She will be here in no time!

Upcoming Doctor's Appointments (ahh! there are only TWO left!)

9/19 at 3:45pm

9/26 at 3:45pm

36 Weeks & Doctor's Appointment



How far along? 36 weeks
Total weight gain: 30 lbs...this can't be right? i didn't eat that much this week!
Maternity clothes? anything comfortable and cool. and the tighter the better (I've found this makes you look less fat)
Stretch marks? still none! woot!
Sleep: actually sleeping really good lately (knock on wood)
Best moment this week: spending a random Wednesday (today) off work with Robert, celebrating our anniversary. he got us coffee, we watched the news about a kidnapping/robbery at an LA bank, went to the beach so I could watch him surf and get some sun and then went to lunch. it was a great day.
Worst moment this week: i spilled a whole glass of water on Robert's Macbook laptop :(
Miss anything? watching football, drinking a pear cider.
Movement: lots of body parts sticking out of my stomach and "flopping" movement
Food cravings: i suddenly love iced tea
Anything making you queasy or sick? still feeling nauseous at night for whatever reason
Labor signs: none yet...i hope i am one of the people that has something obvious to start labor (water breaking, bloody show...ick) because what if i never know i am in labor and the baby just plops out on the floor? (i know all of you already moms are dying laughing over this right now but i am serious!)
Belly button in or out? half in, half out and a little painful
Wedding rings on or off? I'm wearing 2 out of 3 this week. it's the little triumphs :)
Mood? aside from the slight breakdown at ruining the computer, great!
Looking forward to: football starts tonight! and my work baby shower on Friday :)

Our doctor's appointment today was the quickest one yet, I think.  I did have my vaginal exam to test for Group B Strep (a bacteria some mother's have that can be passed on to the baby, whose immune system can't fight it. if i have it it's not a huge deal, they will just give me antibiotics during the birth to protect her); we will get the results next week. She also checked and said the baby is definitely head down and that I am 1cm dilated!  Ahh!  I think she did say something about that meaning the baby will come on time and I won't go past my due date (which is contrary to what she said at my last appointment) but I was too busy freaking out that I am dilated to remember what she said.  She said "the baby is packing up her things and getting ready to move out." AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

Upcoming Doctor's Appointments (ahh! there are only three left!)

9/12 at 3:45pm

9/19 at 3:45pm

9/26 at 3:45pm

My Favorite Things

I read a lot of blogs.  And on these blogs people always list their favorite things; granted it's usually after they have the baby and it's all baby supplies/gadgets/gear but i thought people might care about my favorite things that I have discovered recently that you probably need to buy.

Snoogle - personally, i would have called this a snoodle (snuggle nooodle) but no one asked me :) this is hands down the best thing I have purchased for the pregnancy. it may even be the best thing i have purchased in life.  ever. this thing is amazing; part body pillow, part snuggler, part lifesaver.  The only negative is that sometimes it does feel like there are three people in our bed, but Robert knows better than to complain...if he did he would be the one to have to move to the guest room! Seriously. Doesn't this girl look so happy?

L'Oreal Nature's Therapy Mega Moisture hair conditioner - if you buy one thing on this list, make sure it's this one.  A friend of mine from work brought me a sample and said that she leaves in on her hair overnight and then washes it out in the morning. I tried it and had the softest, most conditioned, tamest hair IN LIFE.  it makes such a difference in the quality of your hair.

Anti Stretch Mark Regime - I may have gone a little overboard when it came to my anti-stretch mark regime, but I wasn't taking any chances.  I can't promise that this will work for everyone but I like to think that it's the secret remedy.

• Burt's Bee's Mama bee belly butter
• Avon Skin-So-Soft
• Palmer's Massage Cream for Stretch Marks - Concentrate
• Vasoline Cocoa Butter Oil (I mix this with regular lotion)

Breathe Right strips - these things are AWESOME! As a lifetime allergy sufferer I have spent many allergy seasons so stuffed up come bed time that I can't breathe, let alone sleep. I always thought these things were geared more towards snorers but I started using them to breath when I got pregnant and couldn't take allergy medicine. it may be my imagination but they LITERALLY clear me up the second I put them on my nose.  Bonus: when you pull them off you can check to see if you had any blackheads, so consider it a sleep aid AND Biore pore strip in one!

Mayo Clinic Guide to Pregnancy - there are a bagillion pregnancy books out there; I'm pretty sure I own half-a-bagillion.  This is the best one I have read; not only do you have the breakdown of what is going on week by week but it also tells you what to expect during childbirth, bringing baby home, and much more.  I was sold on this book when I found out it had a section on how to introduce your dog to your baby and a detailed checklist of how your labor coach (HUSBAND) was expected to act during childbirth. If I don't lay it out there for him, who knows what will happen.

No Crease Hair Ties - I received one of these in my birch box and was instantly obsessed.  Not only are they cute enough to wear as a bracelet, they are meant to be used as hair ties that don't get caught up in your hair OR crease it if left in your hair for too long.  Some places charge $12 for 5 but I found this site where you can get them for $1 a piece. I think they would also be fairly easy to make but I am not confident enough with my knot-tying capabilities to try.

Maxi Skirt from Old Navy - you NEED to own this. I bought it last week and it's soooo comfortable. It doesn't look like it in the picture, but it's really long but not to the point that it drags on the floor. And yes it's just normal clothes, not maternity clothes; I wouldn't do that to you fools.  It also comes in grey and black and white. I probably need to go buy it in every color, that's how much I love it.

Blogs - I read these two blogs religiously.

http://www.modgblog.com/ - sometimes this girl is a little much but posts like this one make me laugh out loud and I think we would be friends if I lived back east.

http://andeelayne.blogspot.com/ - I only recently started reading this and, once you get over how freaking cute this girl is, she has some really cute ideas for fashion, recipes, home decorating, etc

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